If Only I Had……..

If Only I Had……..

“If only I had…” — five simple words that carry the weight of regret, longing, and self-blame. Most of us have whispered them in quiet moments, replaying choices not taken, opportunities missed, or words unsaid. From a spiritual perspective, this phrase offers us more than a doorway to guilt — it opens the path to awareness, healing, and transformation.

Spiritually speaking, our life’s journey is not random. Every experience — even the ones we perceive as mistakes — is part of our soul’s unfolding. When we say, “If only I had,” we’re often looking at life through the rearview mirror, judging ourselves with the limited understanding we had back then. 

But from a higher perspective, there is divine timing, a deeper wisdom at work, even in what we label as ‘wrong turns.’

Instead of drowning in regret, we can gently ask: What is my soul trying to learn from this? Perhaps the relationship that didn’t work out was preparing your heart to love more deeply.

Maybe the job you didn’t take helped you build resilience, humility, or inner strength. From this lens, the past isn’t a list of failures but a sacred classroom. 

Our regrets become stepping stones, not stumbling blocks.

Regret, when left unchecked, contracts our energy and dims our light. It pulls us into a loop of shame, keeping us rooted in the past. But when we bring awareness to it, regret can become a powerful spiritual teacher. It shows us where healing is needed, where forgiveness must flow — whether toward others or ourselves.

Many spiritual traditions speak of the present moment as holy ground. The only place where life truly exists is now. “If only I had” pulls us away from this sacred now, into a past we can’t change. 

But we can change how we relate to that past. We can bless it, thank it, even love it for what it taught us. We can declare, “That version of me did the best they could with what they knew,” and then choose to show up differently today.

A beautiful spiritual practice is to transform “If only I had” into “Next time I will.” This shift moves us from regret to intention, from paralysis to power. 

It turns backward-looking pain into forward-moving wisdom. In this way, our past becomes compost for the soul — rich, fertile ground for new life to grow.

So the next time your heart echoes the familiar ache of “If only I had,” pause. 

Breathe.

Offer compassion to your younger self. Then ask: What would love do now? Because love — real, divine, healing love — doesn’t dwell in punishment. It sees you as whole, even when you forget. And it’s always inviting you to return to your own light.

Regret may visit, but it doesn’t have to stay. Your story is still being written. And every moment is a chance to begin again.

Try it and see!
Love & Light

 Roger

“You are coming from the point towards which you are going.”